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Wednesday, March 08, 2006

See Paris Die!

Do you enjoy watching fingers snipped off, faces peeled and heads severed by carving knives? Refreshingly nasty, isn't it?!? Then, you should watch House of Wax. Despite a slow and occasionally annoying first half, it redeems itself with a supremely gory second half and violence at around that time the first teen gets into trouble. Sure enough, it isn't long before fingers are being cut off with bolt-cutters, mouths are being superglued together and achilles tendons are being severed. Plus, you get to see Paris Hilton meet a grisly end...she catches what appears to be four feet of sharpened spear through the front of her skull. She backs off a few feet with the unwelcome protrusion extending before her, then topples to her knees, falling forward, driving the shaft through more brain matter. The skull itself cracks. Her death is simply priceless! What stands out about House of Wax, are the make up effects, the cool wax-melting effects and the unique and highly creepy backdrop of wax figures. The film has its share of gore and violence that delivers nicely a required level of shocks, jumpiest jumps and screams! It is worth seeing; or just watch it to see Paris Hilton dying a bloody, horrible death!

Car Chasing and Hollering

Okay...so I admit...I watched The Dukes of Hazzard because of Seann Scott Williams (for his killer smile) and Johnny Knoxville. The movie is a remake of the 1979 television series ~ it delivers exactly what it promises - car chasing, smart-ass comments, things getting blown up, girl gazing (Daisy Duke in some skimpy outfit) and yee-hawing! It's silly, it's big, it's loud...and it's most certainly dumb. You might actually feel yourself getting stupider while watching it! The movie has a plot, but it is so superfluous to the movie that there is little point in discussing it. Suffice it to say that it involves despoiling the environment and winning a race. But the real star may be the General Lee, the iconic orange Dodge Charger (with the musical "Dixie" horn) that tears up the pavement and dirt roads in Hazzard County and Atlanta and all points in between.

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